I’ve only been to a night club once in my
life.
Yes, I am 22, and I have only been to a
nightclub once. Well, technically, I have been to one before, but I went with my parents and some other aunties and uncles, so does that really count?
It was early, and the place was dead so, I don’t think so.
My first TRUE nightclub experience began
with my sister’s hen’s night. I honestly did not know what to expect.
I’d seen
nightclubs in movies; they looked foggy, crowded and like they should have an
epileptic seizure warning at the entrance.
Before we went to the nightclub, we went to
a bar.
It wasn’t so bad, I thought, as I wound past the groups of men,
desperately roving for unoccupied girls to talk to. The smell of smoke was
somewhat overpowering in certain areas, but it wasn’t anything I could handle.
The girls bought glasses of wine and started chatting.
I ended up awkward-turtle-ing as they discussed their work and romantic
issues. I, of course, with my minimal experience in those areas, listened
quietly, while pretending to sip my wine and nodding occasionally.
I was never a drinker, and I didn’t enjoy,
nor understand why people enjoyed alcohol, so I would wait until one of the
girls had finished their glass and then say,
After they’d made their way through a bottle,
they headed to the nightclub. By this time, I was already starting to suffer.
I’d come back from 4 years of vet school
for my sister’s wedding, where I’d worn nothing but sneakers, wellingtons and
safety boots. So, high heels were a novelty to my feet and they were not being
kind to me.
Silently cursing my decision of beauty over
comfort, I hobbled after the girls, towards the nightclub.
Surprisingly, the bouncers didn’t stop me
from entering. I’d been stopped outside cinemas while trying to get into a PG-15
movie before, thanks to baby-face syndrome.
It was everything I’d expected.
The flashing lights. The loud music. The
people bumping into each other. A random girl grinding on some random guy.
I was terrified.
But I had to play it cool. I was 21.
21 year olds did things like this, right?
So, I had to push through. Then, when I
grow old, I can look back at myself proudly and tell my grandchildren,
I enjoy dancing, so I managed to, somehow,
screen out the disturbing environment as I danced to the regrettably terrible
music.
Then, it got worse.
More people piled in as the night
progressed, and the dance-floor was so packed that there wasn’t enough space to
even twitch without elbowing someone in the stomach.
Then a fight broke out.
And we left as
quick as we could.
Also, my sister was absolutely jiggered after a few shots.
I’d never been near a really drunk person
before, but there she was, my own sister, unable to walk in a straight line.
I suppose I went into shock at that point,
my poor sheltered heart could not handle it. But my mind was as clear as glass,
and I watched calmly as she stumbled headfirst down a short flight of stairs.
Okay, maybe my mind was not so clear. It
was in a tranquil state of frozen solid. Protecting itself.
At this point, I’d gone into full robot
mode.
I helped the girls steer her to a bench and one of them fetched her water
from a nearby fast-food joint.
Then we waited for our parents to pick us up. I was resigned to our fate.
I knew they were going to be pissed, just
as any traditional Asian parent would be.
When they arrived, I casually slipped into
the seat and, as we started driving, my sister looked at me and whispered,
I then turned to my father, who was driving
and said,
Because my brain decided it would be safer
to say that I was sick, and not the
obviously drunk person beside me. Yeah, that
would save us. Sure.
Unfortunately, he didn’t hear me on time,
and my sis rolled down the window and ralphed all over the side of the car.
And a little bit even got inside.
Well, I tried.
And thus, ended my first experience in a
nightclub, further cementing in my belief that I would not enjoy it.
Do I
regret going?
No, I needed the experience. So, that I would stop glorifying it.
Different folks, different strokes!
Pubs are more my speed, if they’ve got a
good band playing.
